We are in an interesting time where women are waking up from their slumber of hyper-independence and admitting to themselves that actually— I don’t want to do this all my own.

It’s a powerful realization and I’ve seen some good things come out of it.

And yet on the other hand, I’ve also seen so many distortions birthed out of this.

The main distortion I see is the same one that comes up all the time in the realm of men, women, and union (or lack thereof). It is blame or putting the responsibility on men, instead of owning it for yourself and being responsible for your own choices and well being.

Being responsible for your own well being and being hyper-independent are not even remotely the same thing and yet, it seems that the distinction is not so clear to many women.

Similarly, taking responsibility for your own choices and well being does not mean that you blame and shame yourself either.

There is another way; another state.

It is the state where you take full responsibility for your well being and choices.

In this state, you are open to self-exploration and resolving any internal matters that require attention and seek assistance when it’s needed. True empowerment arises here from the realization that your life is entirely within your control.

From this place of inner strength, you can boldly and genuinely desire for expansive union, free from any ulterior motives or external dependencies.

When you shift from a state of needing a man to come and save you to deeply desiring expansive union from a pure place, the man and union of your dreams can actually come into your life.

This is because pure desire is free and it exists on the same level as expansive union.

If, instead, you are operating from the level where you think things like:

Men should do this. Men should do that. He’s supposed to be the provider. He’s supposed to make me feel safe. ETC.

You’re looking for a man to come and save you, you’re entitled, and you’re avoiding taking full responsibility for yourself.

As a result, you’re operating from need and are in a dis-empowered, out of control state.

On this level, the possibility of experiencing expansive love and union is unlikely.

The man you attract from a place of need will be fundamentally different from the man you attract from a space of pure desire.

The former connection is rooted in limitations and unfulfilled needs, while the latter connection is founded upon freedom.

Consequently, the love and connection you can cultivate with a partner called in from pure desire is LIMITLESS... while your relationship with the man you call in from need is LIMITED and most likely has an expiration date.

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